


Nurture the Urge

by AbsolutelyIris



Category: Veronica Mars (TV)
Genre: Alternate Canon, Cheating, Drug Use, F/M, Implied/Referenced Sex, Language, POV Female Character, Sexual Tension, Underage Drinking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-25
Updated: 2014-09-25
Packaged: 2018-02-18 18:28:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,393
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2357858
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AbsolutelyIris/pseuds/AbsolutelyIris
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Veronica Mars,” his words were a taunt, an invite for violence, hate, and destruction. And here she found herself, realizing they were two of a kind.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Nurture the Urge

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Ghostcat](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ghostcat/gifts).



> This was written for the wonderful [ghostcat](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Ghostcat)'s birthday. I hope you like it, darling!
> 
> Thank you to [disdainfullady](http://archiveofourown.org/users/disdainfullady/pseuds/disdainfullady) for looking this over for me and being an encouraging presence as always.
> 
> Title comes from the Garbage song [Shut Your Mouth](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ptr5CpFM2uI).
> 
> Takes place after season two's "Cheatty Cheatty Bang Bang."

“Logan...”

Veronica stared at the blood on Logan’s hands, watching as his fingers flexed and the blood glistened. Before she could stop it, the image of Lilly and her blood drenched hair began to play on a loop in her mind. Over and over and over. She couldn’t understand how those hands had touched Lilly and touched her so gently and so lovingly and how he could’ve stared at her with those eyes that had pure hate and fire in them just minutes earlier.

But most of all, she couldn’t understand the blood on his skin, why he wasn’t washing it away.

“Get out.”

And just like that, Logan Echolls ended the fear that had somehow crept into her.

* * * * *

Duncan pulled into the Echolls estate, weaving around the cars parked haphazardly across the lawn. He frowned as he tried to stop his car without slamming into another expensive vehicle. Finally, he muttered a simple “screw it” and parked roughly between a black BMW and Logan’s yellow XTerra. He shook his head, listening to the booming bass of rap music coming from the mansion. “You sure you want to do this?” he asked Veronica quietly, turning to face her.

Veronica stared at the house, a roar of approval and whistles coming from inside. Undoubtedly, a young, unsuspecting sophomore 09er had just taken off her top. “Logan won’t kick us out. You know that,” she said, her tone soft as the unease that had been swirling in her stomach now crept up her throat. “I still don’t know why he invited us, he isn’t-”

“He invited me, I’m bringing you.”

She turned to face him fully, her eyes widening. “ _What_?”

A look of puzzlement crossed Duncan’s features. “I didn’t tell you?”

“No!”

“Sorry,” he nodded slowly. “About a week after the big reveal about him and Dick’s stepmom- he showed up at my place with his Playstation, saying if I was going to hit him, I could at least watch him kick my ass in Grand Theft Auto,” he grinned. “He kicked my ass, by the way.”

Veronica allowed this information to seep in, growing more than annoyed that Duncan and Logan had renewed their friendship without telling her, and obviously with less difficulty than she had imagined. “You guys never talk at school.”

“Yeah, because Logan doesn’t talk to anyone at school anymore. He _vants_ to be alone.”

“Okay, Garbo, answer this,” she jabbed a finger at his shoulder. “How the hell did you manage to keep this from me?”

His smile faded. “Because it didn't concern you,” A blush crept on her face, and he shook his head. “Nevermind. He just didn’t want you to know.” A long pause as Veronica’s eyes continued to bore into him. “Sorry, Veronica, but it was between me and him.” 

“How super secret society of you both,” she droned, shifting her gaze to her lap. She couldn't help but feel annoyed by their little secret, and more than just a bit hurt. She felt shut out of the discussion and it troubled her. What exactly did he mean by it didn't concern her? Of course it did. 

“Yep.” With a smile playing on his lips, he gestured toward his snazzy 1920's suit. “On a completely non-Logan related note, you could’ve at least told me you were changing your mind- I could’ve bought a new costume.”

She glanced at him briefly before returning her view to the mansion. “We couldn’t be Bonnie and Clyde. We were that three years ago, remember? Lilly made us,” she glanced at her bright yellow jumpsuit. “You don’t like my costume?”

He chuckled, giving her a shrug. “I like the tightness of it, but Kill Bill? You weren’t angry enough last year, Veronica?”

She raised the handle of her plastic samurai sword at him threateningly. “You’re on thin ice, buddy- don’t think I forgot about that major reunion omission of five seconds ago.” 

“I _said_ I was sorry.”

“Nice apology. You should’ve told me!”

He picked up his fedora, putting it on. “Let’s not do this tonight, alright? We’re friends again- or at least attempting to be- and I just want to enjoy myself on this very not-scary Halloween.”

Veronica pouted slightly, more than put off that she was now the odd man out in their little boys club. Logan had made peace with Duncan and they were friends now, and, yes, she was happy, but a part of her had wished that he had attempted this reunion with her involved. Especially considering the last time she was in his home, she was yelling at him and he was taking it. Logan didn't bother to show up at her place with a peace offering, they weren't going to go back to normal any time soon. It stung. 

“I just-”

“Veronica,” Duncan said, the annoyance dripping from his tone. “Logan and I aren't punching each other anymore. You should be happy.”

Her mouth shut as she considered his words. Duncan was right, he was absolutely right. She could allow it, it was baby steps in the right direction. “You are like a hotter Dali Lama.” With a pleased smile, she scooted over in her seat and gave him a soft kiss. He returned it slowly, his hand drifting to her cheek, running down her jaw until-

“Oh, _ew_. Open up! C’mon!”

“Great.” Duncan broke away from Veronica and forced a grin, opening his door and stepping out. “Impeccable timing, Madison.”

“We’ve been taking bets over whether Veronica Mars was going to show. About ten of us are very, very rich by now,” Madison said, her eyes lighting up.

“Because you need the money,” Veronica said cheerfully, clutching her sword tightly as she stepped out of the car. She could already feel the high alert prickling on the back of her neck- Madison was being moderately nice. Madison was _never_ nice. 

Madison grinned at Duncan, her eyes traveling to Veronica. Instantly, the smile vanished. “Logan’s inside, Veronica. He’s having a blast- he’s so _hot_ when he’s in a bad mood,” She gave Duncan a faux-sweet smile. “Sorry, but it’s true.”

Veronica cocked her head, ignoring Madison’s pointed comment and giving her the once-over. Slutty nurse costume- check. Trashy fishnet stocking and exposed lace bra- check. Even trashier make-up- check. “Aw, Madison, someone forgot to tell you tonight didn’t have a Pimps and Hos theme...”

Madison opened her mouth to respond, but was interrupted by a loud crash, and there was Cassidy stumbling out of the mansion, leaving behind a shattered flower pot in his wake. Her eyebrow rose. “Beav, graceful.”

“Dick is looking for you,” Cassidy muttered. Madison rolled her eyes, hurrying back inside the chaos. “Hey, Duncan,” he said, his eyes lighting up at the sight of Veronica. “Hey! Happy Halloween!” he noticed their looks at his leather jacket and slicked-back hair, and he shrugged, embarrassed. “Dick and Logan made me do it.”

Veronica frowned, looking him up and down, then she grinned in recognition. “Grease!”

He nodded and shrugged again. “Y-yeah. I wanted to be Willy Wonka, but Dick said it was gayer than gay- you guys coming in?”

Veronica smiled at Cassidy, more than grateful that it seemed Cassidy wasn’t angry at her over what had happened with his father. In fact, he seemed happier than he had been. In the aftermath of Big Dick’s great escape, it was nice to see at least one person benefiting from the mess. “I’m ready.”

Duncan slipped his arm around Veronica’s waist, nodding at Cassidy. “Let’s go.”

As soon as the three walked in, Veronica felt the familiar sensation of eyes on her, burning into her. She gripped her sword even tighter, feeling the plastic begin to give under her grip. The music pounded in her ears, and she stepped out of the way as a scantily-clad schoolgirl was chased by a bulky Tarzan.

Two arms wrapped around their shoulders, and there was Dick Casablancas, holding two drinks in his hands. “Welcome to Casa De Killer, my very cool and so-very-loyal and not at all freaky friends!” He wiggled the drinks at them, and Duncan and Veronica tentatively took them. He released the two, looking them up and down. “Clyde and...Uma?”

Veronica grinned at Duncan. “Opposites attract!”

Dick was not impressed. “You are the worst couple ever,” he was immediately distracted by the sight of Ashley Banks unfastening yet another button on her dress. “You’re killing me, Ashley!” he hollered, going after her. 

Duncan raised his glass to Veronica. “Cheers,” he said quietly, bringing the cup to his lips.

Two hands reached over, firmly taking the cups away from the two. “You don’t want to drink that,” Logan muttered, setting the cups on a nearby table. Duncan and Veronica stared at Logan, clad in a tight black t-shirt, leather jacket, and black jeans. He pushed his sunglasses on his head, staring back.“You never know. Come on, didn’t you two learn anything from the last after school special? ” 

Veronica couldn't stop the flinch at Logan's words, lowering her head briefly before meeting his gaze, nodding quickly. The pain was surprising, she hadn't expected it to still sting. She could feel the guilt in Logan's dark humor, he wasn't teasing _them_ , he was lambasting _himself_. It felt bizarre, that in-between state of bitterness and odd gratitude then. She hated that she wanted to thank him.

Her eyes drifted to Duncan, frowning slightly at the dull impatience in his eyes.

“Watch your drinks, stay inside the lines, look before you cross...” Logan mumbled, scratching at his head as he finally seemed to notice the stares on him. “What?”

“Are you drunk?” Duncan asked bluntly, giving him a wary once-over.

“Just a little bit.” he said with a crooked grin, quickly pulling his sunglasses back over his eyes. He glanced at Veronica, his eyebrows raising. “ _Nice_ costume, _Ronnie_!”

“Thank you,” she muttered, ignoring the sharpness of that nickname on his tongue, her gaze turning to the floor. She felt his eyes on her, and for just a moment she felt like he was judging her- nothing like their encounter in his bedroom weeks before. He wasn’t pretending not to care anymore, she could see it in his eyes. He was observing her, watching for her reaction, judging her. The booze made him bolder. She hated that. 

“Kill Bill?” Logan asked loudly over the music, lifting up his sunglasses once more to get a good look at her.

Veronica nodded quickly, worrying the handle of her katana with her nail. “Yeah.”

“Am I Bill? Are you gonna kill me, _Ronnie_?” She looked up, and he was smirking at her, his eyes lighting up. It wasn’t an particularly nice smile, more like a fiery leer and an invite for a fight rolled into one. 

She could say with conviction she hated Logan when he was this drunk.

She smiled politely, not really wanting to play this game with him, especially in front of Duncan. If he was feeling guilty about the whole Casablancas situation, he wasn’t showing it at all. And to top it all off, he was feeling the need to be a jackass at the same time. _No, thank you, Logan Echolls._ “No, you’re Logan. Just Logan.”

He winked at her before turning to Duncan, his back to her and thus shutting her out of the conversation. She stood there for a couple of seconds, waiting for Duncan to call her over or at least acknowledge her, and when he didn’t, she shook her head and started toward the drinks table.

The boys club was definitely back in session, but this time she didn’t have Lilly- or even Wallace- to keep her company.

Veronica picked up a coke, watching the 09ers that gave her hell for over a year partying around her. She sighed, wondering what possessed her to dress up the way she did for the biggest gathering of 09ers since the party at Shelly Pomroy’s. She knew she could’ve dressed up in the costume she and Duncan had decided on, fit in and made meaningless small talk with the group, and yet she dressed loud and bloody and their suspicious, disgusted looks returned...

She inhaled deeply before heading back to the two boys. Duncan grinned at the sight of her, while Logan remained frustratingly blank. She opened her can of soda, taking a sip. “Can I come back into the conversation, now?”

Logan smiled slowly, and she froze. Something in his smile was both unsettling and almost sad. He reached over, grabbing one of the cups from the table next to them. With a flourish, he produced a tiny vial from his pocket which made Veronica's blood run cold. He must have noticed her pale, for he smiled grimly as he poured the contents into the cup. “I only have one. For me. And only me.”

He toasted Veronica grandly. “Here’s to you, Miss Mars.” His eyes still on her, he gulped the beverage down to the last drop before dropping the cup to the floor. He glanced at Duncan and offered a slight grin, and Duncan returned it half-heartedly. 

Veronica’s eyes drifted to her drink, her throat suddenly dry. “Logan...”

“Logan!” 

The three looked around for the voice, and a brunette 09er in a french maid outfit entered their circle, holding a shot glass filled with tequila, a slice of lemon, and a salt shaker. “Logan Echolls, care for a shot?”

He grinned at her, and Veronica winced at the look in his eyes. Pure, unadulterated lust. “Oh, la, la- are you giving me the honors?”

Duncan caught Veronica’s eyes and shrugged, smiling slightly. She didn’t return the grin, her eyes turning back to Logan and the Skank of the Week. Unable to look away. Her interest was as detached as possible. Step out of your body, be a spectator, don't take it personally, _it doesn't concern you_...

The French Maid dipped the salt on her chest, just above her breasts, and wiggled the glass at Logan. Her other hand placed the lemon slice in her mouth.

Logan’s eyebrows rose, and he grinned at Duncan and Veronica, amused. “Duty calls.” he muttered, grabbing the glass. He leaned down, licking the salt off the girl’s chest. He lifted his head and downed the shot, not waiting to swallow before grabbing the girl’s hair, forcing her mouth on his.

“I’ve never, ever seen him this rowdy,” Duncan said, his eyes locked on the scene in front of him. “Never.” he whistled as the girl reached up, pulling the lemon from between their lips. Logan didn’t miss a beat, continuing his assault on her mouth.

“And yet...” Veronica muttered, ripping her gaze away from Logan.

Logan finally came up for air, pushing the girl away in the process. With a shake of his head, he wiped at his mouth. “Yeah, I have no idea who she is.”

“Charming,” Veronica grasped Duncan by the elbow, giving him a pointed look. “Let's go mingle with more people that hate me.”

Logan laughed, picking up the other cup. “Oh, _Ronnie_..it's not so bad. Look at me, everyone hates me. Embrace it.”

She rolled her eyes, pulling Duncan toward the table filled with bowls of food and trays of jello shots. She tried to relax as Duncan attempted to engage her in conversation, doing a shot with him and feigning amusement at Casey's lame joke. These parties were more fun before Shelly Pomroy's and when Lilly was actually breathing, she thought. A lifetime ago. She didn't even have Wallace or Logan around to make her laugh, although Casey and Duncan were trying their hardest. 

God, she just wanted to go home.

A loud crash erupted over the music and her mouth dropped slightly as she watched Logan nearly throw some sophomore into one of the DVD shelves. He swung viciously, connecting and the guy crumbled. He continued his assault until Casey and Dick pulled him off the guy as Madison darted out of the way. 

“What happened?” Duncan exclaimed as Madison grasped his arm, her breathless glee all over her face.

“Derrick Johnson talked shit about Logan's mom so he got hit,” Madison said with a laugh. 

Logan was loudly arguing with Dick and Casey, who weren't allowing him to go after the now bleeding Derrick Johnson and Logan finally gave up, stomping away and disappearing down the hallway. 

Duncan shook his head, setting down his drink. “I'll be back,” he said with an aggravated sigh of someone who had done this way too often. 

“Let me go talk to him,” Veronica muttered, handing Duncan her sword. She and Logan had been icy with each other since the confrontation over Kendall Casablancas, maybe she could at least make an attempt to hand the olive branch over. Duncan and Logan were friends again, they could be too.

Duncan's eyes darted to the hall and back to Veronica. “I don't-”

“You go in there, he might hit you,” she smiled grimly. “He won't hit me.”

Veronica gave Duncan's arm a reassuring squeeze before she pushed her away through the crowd. It was Shelly Pomroy's party all over again, except this time there were wary and almost fearful looks mixed with those of disdain. She preferred it this way. She stood a fighting chance this way. 

She jiggled the knob, her lips pressing together at the realization that the door was locked. “Logan, it's me. Open.” Silence met her and she let out a huff, jerking the knob for emphasis. “Logan, if you don't open the door, I'm picking the lock.”

She waits. One potato, two potato, three potato, four-

There's a click of a lock and the door swung open. Logan was already stomping back to his seat at the edge of the tub, so Veronica inhaled deeply before moving inside, closing the door behind her. She glanced around the spacious bathroom, taking it in. The huge Jacuzzi tub, the huge shower, three huge sinks- everything about this bathroom was huge. Nothing but the best for a Hollywood family. 

“Veronica Mars,” his words were a taunt, an invite for violence, hate, and destruction. And here she found herself, realizing they were two of a kind. His tone matched how she felt for the last year and a half. That the sight of him sitting there, tense and with blood on his knuckles didn't exactly scare her. 

“Logan Echolls,” she droned, picking up a hand towel from the sink. She jerked on the water, running the towel under it before facing him. “Let me see.”

“No.”

She halted, her eyes narrowing. “No...” she parroted.

Logan's mouth twitched uncomfortably as he glanced down at his hand. He flexed his fingers, examining the damage. “You don't get to do that,” he muttered. “Not anymore.”

Veronica knew what he meant. She didn't get to worry over him anymore. And yet she wanted to hear it from his lips, the need surprised her. It had ghosted the edges of her mind and she was able to ignore it most of the time but now, now with no distractions or anywhere to run, it pushed to the surface. “I don't get to do what anymore, Logan.”

His head jerked up, the scowl already in place. “ _Why_ are you here?” he snapped, ignoring her question. “Go fucking make out with your perfect boyfriend. Leave me the fuck alone.”

She didn't respond as she approached him, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of a reaction. She sat next to him, holding out the towel. He didn't look at her so she nearly snatched his hand before he could oppose, holding the wet towel against his knuckles. “And here I thought you were starting to grow up,” she said, unable to keep the bite from her tone. 

“Look at you, all helpful. You've got that long-suffering wife routine down. Rough year, huh?” he said in a low, dangerous voice. He leaned forward slightly to stare at her, and she met his gaze, frozen by the coldness of his eyes. “But I bet I got you beat.” A chilly pause. “Wanna bet?”

“You don't want to play this game, Logan,” she said with a bitter laugh.

“I think I do.”

Veronica jumped to her feet, moving for the door. “Look, I came in here to check on you but you don't want to play nice so-”

“You playing nice means there's a knife about to be shoved in my back-”

She stopped, facing him completely. In return, he tilted back, watching her. His stare was expectant but almost mocking. Like he got a genuine glee out of their spats. Hell, she knew he did. It was all a game to him. It pissed her off. “Logan, I’m not going to do this now.”

A slow, amused smile formed on his lips. “So we can only do this when _you_ want? I can go to my room and you can barge in if that's what makes you comfortable,” he paused, making a show of mulling whatever thoughts were going on in his head. “We can talk in my pool house since I know that _really_ makes you comfortable-”

“What is your problem?” Veronica snapped, taking a step, and then another, forward. 

“Oh, I'm sorry, Veronica,” Logan jumped to his feet, a step made in her direction. “Don't want to remember your _wet, hot_ American summer-”

“Like you care,” she shot back, her fingers curling into her palm. “I'm sure you've told your pals all about my _wet hot American summer_ while you burned that pool-”

“Who the fuck do you think I am?” he interrupted harshly, moving swiftly toward her now. She backed up until her back hit the door, inhaling sharply as he leaned in, his face inches from hers. “I would never tell them anything we did. _Never_.”

Veronica stayed silent, her jaw clenching.

Something flashed in Logan's eyes, then. Something dangerous. It scared her. Her eyes stayed locked on his as he tilted his head, the tip of his nose brushing over hers. “Have you told Duncan?” he murmured and she swallowed hard as he leaned in, his hips so close. “Does Duncan know about how we would spend Friday nights swimming by ourselves in my pool, swimming and drinking? How we would go into the pool house and listen to music and have fun?” his eyes glazed over and she could almost see the drugs starting to work. Maybe. Maybe it was just her imagination, trying to keep her from listening to him. “That little pink and white bikini that was a little bit sheer when it got wet...you knew it was, didn't you?” 

She straightened her head, meeting his gaze head on and he grinned widely now. 

“You wear that one with Duncan?” she didn't respond and he licked his lips slowly, measured just for her and she couldn't stop her gaze from flitting down to it, just for a second. “I thought so.”

His fingers trailed up the front zipper of her jumpsuit and she remained still, refusing to give him what he wanted. A reaction. And so he kept going because she hadn't stopped him either, had she? “You got real bold a couple of times when the sun went down, in the pool house. That was always fun. Remember?”

Of course she remembered. Her foot sliding up his thigh while they sat across from each other, still wet from the pool. Taking off her top underneath the towel he wrapped around her and tossing it at him. Rubbing and sliding on him until she was boneless and heart slamming in her chest. The black leather of his chair sticking to her thighs and back as his fingers slipped under her bikini bottom and his surprised gaze locking on hers as she held his wrist down. Grasping the sides of his face as she brought his head down to kiss each of his eyelids, then his mouth, before running to her car. Taking care of herself in the dark of her bedroom because she didn't know true frustration until Logan fucking Echolls. Deciding every Thursday night that this would be the weekend they would finally have sex because god, she _wanted_ it, before getting cold feet. Logan saying “it's okay” and knowing he wasn't just _saying_ it, he meant it. How much that had actually meant to her. 

She remembered the pool house. Of course she did. A lot of good, fun, memorable things happened there. But that was before Logan decided revenge was a better partner than her. Before she became an afterthought. 

Before this.

“Why would I tell anyone about us?” Logan whispered, and his mouth was so close to hers now, his breath tickling her chin. “That's mine. All mine.”

Veronica blinked, hoping he couldn't see what she was feeling. The way her skin was heating up under her suit, the heat moving up her neck, on its way to her cheeks. Her mouth opened as he slid the zipper down one row of teeth, then another. Slowly. So slowly. “Are you done?” she muttered, trying to will her body to move, to push him away, to get out of there.

“Do you want me to be done?” His words were slurring a bit now. 

It took her a long moment to realize he was actually waiting for an answer. He was waiting as he slid the zipper down another row, and another. Excruciatingly slow. 

She doesn't know how it happened. She had opened her mouth and leaned forward, she thinks she was trying to get away from him, maybe. Push him away, maybe. Get his fucking hands off her outfit, maybe. 

Instead, his mouth slid over hers effortlessly and he has her pushed back against the door, deepening the kiss. She grasped at his jacket, neither pushing or pulling him, gasping as his hand drifted to her neck, holding her put. There was nothing gentle about the kiss, it was rough, violent. She found herself pushing against the length of him, surely to gain the upper hand, her mouth pressing just as hard, feeling him groan against her lips.

It was a struggle, both pushing at each other, not touching beyond her fingers curled in his jacket and his hand pressed against her clavicle. Harsh and hungry and all teeth and saliva and tongue and spite. Her other hand remained clenched in a fist at her side, knowing all too well if she touched him, that hand would bury itself in his hair, undo his jeans, pull off that jacket. Would let him pull down her zipper, let him bend her over, have one of those drunken hook ups Lilly always boasted about, get some of the tension released. 

She came in there to mend at least a sliver of their friendship or at least soften their current coldness and there was some instruction manual which showed nine out of ten doctors agreed, making out with your former friend-boyfriend-chemistry partner-enemy was a surefire fix for your problems. 

His teeth nipped at her lower lip and she whined in approval, her fingers tightening over leather as he gasped at the sound, pressing his mouth harder, breathing her in. Another moan escaped him, then her, and it was then her head caught up with everything else and-

“Duncan!”

Her boyfriend's name was a breathless rasp, an exclamation and a question and a reminder and Logan froze, his hand pressed against her collarbone. With that hand, he pushed her back from him, a hint of betrayal in his drug hazed eyes as he backed away and dropped to the edge of the tub. 

Veronica swallowed hard as she wiped at her mouth, her mouth tingling and she wanted to tell him, tell him she wasn't thinking of Duncan, that wasn't what that meant but why did she owe him an explanation, why did she have to clarify when they were the ones doing something very bad in this bathroom? What the hell was she thinking, letting him do that?

“Logan...”

“Get out.”

There wasn't a comeback, no insult, no answer at all as she turned numbly, walking out of the bathroom. 

The party was picking up, the music and the kids louder, the entire house hotter. Veronica forced her way through the crowd, searching for Duncan, wanting to find him before Logan decided he wanted to fully enjoy his drug and drunk stupor in the presence of his frenemies. She found Duncan by the bar, laughing as Dick continued to beg Ashley to take off her top. 

“I wanna go,” she said in Duncan's ear, keeping her gaze down. She didn't want Duncan to see her face at the moment. She was confused, dizzy, and nauseous. It might have been the environment, maybe the Logan incident but she was just done. “Let's go, take me home.”

Duncan blinked in surprise, concern flashing in his eyes. “I thought you were sleeping over?”

She shook her head swiftly, taking her sword from his hands. “I don't think so. I'm super tired, let's just go.”

* * * * *

Veronica decided during her night of tossing and turning that she would approach Logan before class, just to clear the air. To see where they stood. It was a mature plan, an adult one. They could move past all of this, they could be friends again.

Logan looked mildly surprised when she grabbed him by the elbow before fourth period, yanking him away from Dick and Carmen. She stopped by a row of lockers, letting go of his arm. “Okay, about the party-”

“Yeah, check it out,” he smirked, holding up his hand. Bruises and cuts adorned his tan skin, the bruises dark and ugly. “Pops would be proud.”

“Not that,” she shook her head quickly, looking up at him. “Look, what happened in the bathroom. I'm not going to take it seriously because-”

He frowned. “Take what seriously?”

Veronica blinked, shaking her head once more. She couldn't tell if he was playing dumb for his own protection or if she was going crazy. That kiss definitely happened. She remembered it happening. This wasn't some hallucination. “The...the thing. You-”

Logan laughed, shaking his head. “Veronica, that entire night was a blur. I didn't even remember how I got these cuts until Dick told me. And I saw Derrick's face. Apparently, he deserved it so the beat down wasn't wasteful,” he winked at her, leaning in slightly. “What are _you_ talking about?”

“The beating,” she said numbly, unable to stop the baffling disappointment from settling in her stomach. Why was she disappointed? This was what she wanted. It didn't happen. None of it happened. It was already forgotten. “I gotta go.”

He smirked as she turned and started walking away, leaning against the locker. “Aw, did you just want to talk? Miss me?”

Veronica shook her head, her jaw clenching as Dick started to laugh behind her. She pushed her hair behind her ears, turning the corner and only then did she allow herself to exhale. She was free. Wasn't she?

* * * * *

“How's Logan?”

Veronica blinked, glancing over at Duncan as he drove leisurely to her apartment. She knew what the crawl meant, he wanted to make out for a while. She was probably going to have to cut it short tonight, she was too frazzled. Too confused. Too sure of the knowledge that she would be returning to old habits in bed and taking it upon herself to release some tension. 

“He's fine,” she mumbled, her fingers clenching over her sword handle. “Just...Logan.”

“He just has to sleep it off.”

She nodded quickly, sighing as she glanced down at her lap.

Duncan pulled to a stop in front of the apartments, turning to face her. He laughed slightly, pushing her hair aside as he looked her up and down. “You did a good job with the fake blood, baby, it looks great.”

Veronica's eyes drifted down, looking at the bright red splatters on her front and then, on her chest and streaked down her top and over the zipper, blood that had begun to brown over. It wasn't going to come out, the outfit was ruined. She lifted her head before she could become too fixated on it, giving Duncan as bright of a smile as she could manage. “Yeah.”


End file.
